Watch this video, I tell you the 3 steps needed to accomplish ANY GOAL!
This system ALWAYS works, but you’ve got to work the system.
The steps sound easy, but knowing exactly what each of the steps are for you can be a little tricky – so tune in and find out what this ‘guaranteed to work‘ system is and how you can apply it to your goals!
It’s time to stop feeling like you’re getting old and your best days are behind you.
It’s time to get your goals – and your life – on track so you can BE MORE of who you really are, DO MORE that makes you happy and fulfilled, and HAVE MORE of the life you’ll love living EVERY DAY. If you liked this video, you can dive into these concepts even more in the Savvy Sizzle “NO REGRETS” workshop.
It’s a brand new baby year, Victory Chicks! And Yayyy! The last one grew whiskers pretty fast and we were ready to see it go months before it was over.
This fresh new year gives you a blank slate. You can write whatever you want on it. What do you want out of this year – besides “back to normal?”
Of course, it’s a given to write your goal down. Note that I said “goal” and not “goals”. Just pick one that is important and/or meaningful to you. If you have one big goal, break it into small doable goals and focus on just the first one. If you have a list of different goals, it’s OK – but just pick one right now as your starter goal. When you achieve that goal, you can set another one, Success and victory feed off each other!
Start Here for New Year Goal Success!
You already know to write your goal down. If it’s not written, you’re not accountable to it. Also, choose a realistic date to accomplish it.
That feels good, right? It’s easy to get started, but realistically-speaking, you can expect your enthusiasm to wane. Statistically it take about 6 weeks for the new year – new you honeymoon to be over.
Three Tips to Keep Your Success Going
For your success, here are 3 tips to keep your motivation going:
Know your why. If you pick a goal and don’t have a compelling reason, you’ll easily get off-track. Why do you want your goal?
Make daily mini-goals. Big goals can overwhelm, but making 3 phone calls to clients or doing 20″ of exercise…those are doable.
Make a reward jar. Think of 20+ small rewards for yourself. It should be something that doesn’t need a lot of time or money. Write each one on a separate piece of paper. Each time you finish the days mini-goals, take a piece of paper and reward yourself.
You can make more of this year by adding those three small tips.
Want More Purpose & Direction for the New Year?
Join me for the first Savvy Sizzle workshop of 2021. I’m starting with a free class on January 19. You can register here: Savvy Sizzle
A recent segment on Sunday Morning featured the Nancy Drew books and got me thinking about midlife reinventions.
In the beginning...
I started my first book series with the Bobbsey twins. By the time I had my fill of those, and some of the classics like Heidi, I was so ready for Nancy Drew.
I bookishly looked up to Nancy. She was older than me, a mature 16. She had two besties – Beth and George – who were also her sometimes-assistants in crime-solving.
Nancy also had a boyfriend, Ned. He was the best! Ned was a mature older man (he was in college), which automatically made him sooooo cool. Ned even occasionally helped Nancy catch the bad guy. I remember Ned as being the kind of guy who, though Nancy’s sleuthing made him nervous, he supported her. I don’t know if they did a lot of kissing, and Ned never pressured Nancy for sex – which was good because it probably would have flipped my prepubescent brain into turmoil.
However, in Nancy’s world, no matter who was around, she was always the mover and shaker. Nancy Drew was my first example of a female who bucked the system (Katherine Hepburn, in those old 1940’s-50’s movies was my second). In my too-shy childhood, Nancy was my friend. The quiet hours I spent with Nancy were some of the sweetest, safest, and best of my childhood.
For Midlife Women, the question I ask is “Now What?”
Nancy is getting up there in years – she’s 90 now. Yet her antics since she solved he first crime in the 1930’s are still inspiring young girls.
So are yours! What you’re doing and how you’re living is being noticed by your children and grandchildren. What are you doing about it?
Starting Something New
Almost as old as Nancy Drew is one of my mentors, Robbie Motter. She recently turned 84. After an almost-storied life of personal and professional challenges, including breaking through a couple glass ceilings and – more recently – beating breast cancer, you might think Robbie would be happy lounging around playing MaJong, She isn’t.
Robbie’s made herself comfortable with pushing ahead and taking risks. Her passion is helping other women succeed. She’s been doing it for years but she recently started something new. Not surprisingly for Robbie, it’s a non-profit women’s organization, The Global Society of Female Executives. Robbie Motter is still spreading her wings. Women are watching her – and she’s inspiring them.
Legacy Matters – It’s Never Too Late For New Adventure!
Same with Susan, a resilient woman who passed away…way too soon. Last year I attended her memorial service during which several grandkids delivered eulogies. One by one, four young adults told funny stories about their grandmother’s little quirks; they made us all laugh.
They also shared the lessons they learned from their grandmother, and they each seemed to share these two: it’s never too late for a new adventure and never give up. Those four young people are taking their grandmom’s lessons into adulthood.
What About You? What Goals are on Your Mind?
As we wind our way out of this incredibly challenging year and into a fresh new – and hopefully more normal – year, what goals are you thinking about now?
Are you simply willing to hold on to what you’ve got? Or are you ready for a new Nancy Drew adventure? Did you learn something during the covid lockdown that could become your business? Did you get a good idea for how to help hungry people? Or did the lockdown make you realize you need to have more fun, or more travel, or more of something you’ve been missing?
Life Change – Go for it!
Whatever it is, this is your time to reinvent yourself – no matter what your age! And BRAVA!for stepping up to do it!
Need Some Help Finding Your Own Adventure?
If you need some help and support, join me for my 2021 Savvy Sizzle workshop – on zoom – starting soon.. Check it out here: Savvy Sizzle #ReinventingMidlife #Startingoverafter40 #reinventingyourlife
Whew! For months I thought Election Day 2020 was never going to come. Didn’t you? I felt stressed as the day drew closer – were you feeling it too? Political ads were all over TV, with only a break when the Medicare ads came on 🙂 And, just in case you managed to veer off into non-political thought, phone texts brought you back. So now that it’s over – OK, almost over – except for the final counting…and it looks like it may be a little while before we know who is officially the next president. Who knows? It’s 2020!
So now…take a deep breath and think. What’s next – FOR YOU?
In spite of being up in the air politically here’s the most important thing you need to know right now. Whether your preferred candidate wins or loses, the reality is this: you’re going to be here, living your life…every day. You’re going wake up, get dressed, and go about your day. No matter what else is going on, good, bad, and indifferent, for the most part, you are and will be in control of your everyday life.
What will that mean for you?
If you ever doubted your personal power, this pandemic year proved you’ve got it. Remember at the beginning, how you felt lost? You couldn’t go to the store whenever and however you wanted, you scrambled to get basics like toilet paper and bleach…and sometimes food. And, omg, even wine or alcohol. You masked up and social distanced and there was fear everywhere.
However, as the months rolled on, you settled into a routine. You found ways to keep in touch with family and friends, created new workspaces in your home, binged TV series, did online yoga and exercise…and made a hundred other adjustments. You even managed to find some good in things that you otherwise wouldn’t have known about or noticed in the busyness of life before covid. So…
Now what? What’s next?
Here’s a thought…Research shows that what you focus on expands. That like attracts like. So what’s your focus – for right now, for the New Year, for your future? If you focus on the worst, you’ll get it. If you focus on the best, you’re making space for it to come into your life.
What do you want in the coming New Year? Do you need to create more satisfying goals? Rebuild a business? Focus on your health? Reset your marriage or relationship? Find a new partner?
I can help you!
Whether it’s you need to get your life back on track, or shore up your marriage or relationship, in January and February I’ll be offering BOTH the Savvy Sizzle and Relationship Reset workshops – designed to help you rethink, regroup, and move forward. I’ll talk more about those dates and topics next month. In the meantime,join me next Tuesday, November 10, at 2pm for some Victory Chick Chat in a FREE zoom meeting. We’ll be talking about the five questions I asked in my last email…about what happiness and success are, what things make you feel special, and what brings you joy.
We’ll have an easy exchange of thoughts and ideas via zoom – and start thinking about the new year…which is bound to be better than 2020!
You can register here:SAVVY SIZZLE Use this download with the questions to think about so you can start jotting down your ideas between now and Tuesday. Find out what other Victory Chicks are thinking and feeling at the FREE zoom meeting. And, hey, invite your guys too. You’re in it the together, right?
I’ll look forward to chatting with you on Tuesday!
With love and in Victory, Annmarie
Did you spend 2020 waiting for it to be over and hoping that 2021 will be better? Are you feeling lost, not sure where to go or what to do? Feel stuck in a rut and not sure how to break free? Here’s where to start:
Join my FREE EVENT for midlife women!
Join me on January 19 at 1pm EST for a discussion about happiness & personal fulfillment to help you uncover your inner spark and how you can harness that passion to create a life you LOVE living!
Not only do you feel it’s time to rediscover and fire up your inner passion, but you want to DO something with it – something that will make an impact on your daily life. Then you’re ready for SAVVY SIZZLE! This online course will walk you step-by-step, through the lifestyle reinvention process that let’s you ditch the frump and fizzle for a fabulous SAVVY SIZZLE!
You deserve to feel the passion and excitement – and hope – you once had. Remember what it felt like to have your whole life ahead of you? Before responsibilities and commitments filled up every last minute of every day? Before your efforts and attention were focused on everyone else?
I have great news for you – IT’S NOT TOO LATE! I can show you how to find that inner spark and set your heart ablaze with happiness and excitement. Let’s do this! Together! Join me, Annmarie Kelly, in the Savvy Sizzle Master Class and we’ll get it going! Sign up here: /victorious-woman/savvy-sizzle/
2020 will definitely be a year for the books…and the book will read like a bad Stephen King novel. Actually I’m not sure even King would write it this way!
Still, maybe there’s an upside you aren’t considering…
If you ever doubted your personal power, 2020 surely reminded you that, even in the worst of times, you’ve got plenty of power! After all, you dealt with all kinds of loss and, at the same time, you managed staying home, converted your dining room into an office, did without a social life except for zoom, suffered from zoom fatigue, became a homeschooling parent, passed on vacation, missed your grandkids, played games, did puzzles, binged everything on Prime and Netflix, and cooked and baked more than usual – sometimes figuring out what to make based on whatever you could find in the pantry, and packed on a few pandemic pounds. And that’s just the physical stuff.
And that was the easy stuff!
If you’re like me and most of the women I talk to, you also struggle with emotional stuff, including some depression…and, at the same time, you pull it together to help the people you live with deal with their emotions.
So…so what if you didn’t shower every day (it was so good for your skin!), or didn’t clean the house (who was going to see it anyway?), or drank a little more than usual (OK, some days maybe more than a little) and did a few things you wouldn’t want to share with anyone, including that terrible meltdown (or maybe that’s just me…). And you’re still here! If nothing else, as you look back over this year, you proved to yourself that you are one powerful woman.
Yes, you’re not a saint. Nobody is. However, you ARE a Victorious Woman!
Good for you! Now, with 2020 almost in the rearview mirror (and good riddance), a covid vaccine in sight (we hope), and you can optimistically anticipate a return to some happier form of normal. So let’s focus on 2021.
What do you want to do with the brand new baby year ahead?
Don’t tell me you’re too stressed for that! The fact is that no matter what happens with covid, no matter who wins the election, no matter what crisis this season’s bachelorette faces, you life is your own.
The future is yours to mold and shape into your happiness and success. What will you do with it?
To help you get started, here are five questions (below) or you can click here for a downloadable PDF workbook. Write them down and work with them over the next month. And don’t rush – just do one every couple of days.
Talk with Other Women who are Pursuing THEIR Midlife Goals!
THEN…Let’s talk about them together…on November 10 @2pm. I’m hosting a FREE zoom meeting for us to talk – together – about how we can make the most of the new year – in spite of the crazy around us. So copy the questions below and plan to join me for some Victory Chick Chat. You can register for our phone call here: VictoryChickChat OK…get the brand new baby year started with these:
What is happiness to you? When I ask my groups to answer this one, many Victory Chicks are surprised by their own answers. It’s foundational because, once you know what it is, your focus changes and you can more easily get more juiced about the future – which can attract more good jazz into your life (like attracts like).
What is success? Covid probably made you rethink success, so what is it now? Did lockdown – or an illness, lost job, or empty nest – make you reevaluate your work and push you in a new direction?
What are 5 things that fill me up? Once you get crystal clear about these, you can fill yourself up more often.
What are 5 things that make me feel special? This one is as much for the others in your life as it is for you. I share mine with my sweetie…so he doesn’t have to guess about how to make me feel special…and can do them more often.
When I’m feeling my own personal power, what am I doing? Do you feel your power when you’re working, when you complete a tough task, accomplish a goal, or are reminded that you are being a role model to your kids? Or is your power found in some form of art…or volunteering…or activism…or something else?
These seem like five simple questions, but they are powerful!
Listen…the world isn’t ending…it just feels that way sometimes.
That’s why we need to stay focused on what’s good and what we can control. That’s what we’ll do together on November 10…so register now. Remember: only you can control what goes on between your ears. That’s what I think…
YOUR TURN! What do you think?You know I’d LOVE to hear your feedback on what I’ve been doing with Five-Year Marriage and The Victorious Woman Project. Tell me, what do you think? I really want to know what you think is good, what annoys you, what’s helpful, what’s not relevant? What would you like to see more of? I’m always interested in improving & evolving. CLICK HERE to send me feedback! Until next time…with love and in Victory, Annmarie
Did you know August is Romance Awareness Month? Honestly, it’s arrived at the perfect time – after MONTHS of summer lockdown, romance has likely taken a back seat.
So in honor of Eileen Buchheim’s mission to encourage couples to enhance their relationships throughout the year, I’ve created a 31-Day Romance Month Challenge! I designed it to help YOU put a little sparkle and fire back into YOUR relationship. It’s chock full of easy & quick gestures of love and simple activities that you can do for, or with, your sweetie! . You can download it HERE.
And if you don’t feel like you’re relationship is in the right “space” for the romance challenge, read on!
Big Changes Strain Relationships
Whether you’re going through a career change, a family illness, financial struggles, unemployment, or you just can’t stand being around your sweetie 24/7, or any of the million other struggles people are facing these days, change happens. And change can test even the most solid relationships.
2020 has been an especially rough year. One thing Joseph & I have been doing to keep our sanity is utilizing the Family Meeting outlined in my lasted book, The Five Year Marriage®. We don’t just ignore problems and hope they go away (they never do!) We SOLVE them. Together.
Before you consider divorce, consider this
During the imposed lock down, I decided to boil down the best parts of The Five Year Marriage® – the ones that make the most sense for established couples. Then I arranged them into a manageable and highly effective format that couples can use to help get their relationships back on the right track, right now. I call itThe 30-Day Relationship Reset!
You’ve got Options!
Whether you’re interested in sparking a little romance with the 31 Day Romance Challenge or if you’re in need a something a little more significant like the 30 Day Relationship Reset – you’ve got options. You’re not stuck, you can make a change. I wholeheartedly believe that, and it’s my life’s passion to help you along your journey to Victory!
I hate my job and I hate working. If it wasn’t for the money and the medical benefits, I’d quit now. Are you one of the many women who feel that way? Not so fast. One of the secrets to a long and healthy life might just be work – work you LOVE.
Passions are your key to happiness
Marilee Shapiro Asher was still sculpting and making art at 103 while living in her Washington DC retirement community. She told readers of her autobiography, published when Marilee was 102, “I have no personal philosophy of art, I do it because there is nothing else I would rather be doing.“
Mabel Sawhill, in her third career, catered events. She was around so long that she catered some couple’s weddings AND their 50th anniversaries! When she died in her sleep at age 103, she still had catering gigs, and people yearned for her sticky buns and chicken salad. Her longevity secret: to be engaged and find delight in everything life had to offer.
Honey Canney started teaching water aerobics in 1972. She she was in her early sixties then. She still teaches those classes three times a week -at 103! Though she is nearly blind as a result of macular degeneration, she finds the water gives her freedom. And, she says, “I can be of some use to somebody and not sit around and suck my thumb. I miss the things I can’t do, but I kinda dwell on the ones I can do.“
For Rose Torphy, 103-year-old great grandmother loves helping to preserve one of America the Beautiful’s crowing glories, the Grand Canyon – which was formed 100 years ago, when Rose was just a little girl!. When she was recently inducted as a Grand Canyon junior ranger, Rose told Good Morning America.“I am so happy someone is watching over it so that my great-great-grandchildren can visit it someday too.”
What’s your passion?
If you knew for sure that you were going to live to be 100, what would you do differently? Would you get that law degree or satisfy your love of animals by becoming a veterinarian? Maybe you’d start your own business, become a teacher or a psychologist?
What fabulous itch is just dying to be scratched?
Whatever it is, take the first step today. Do some online research, connect with someone who is already doing it, make a vision board and start dreaming.
Janice was in tears and her voice was shaking. She was back at the popular weight loss meeting, for the third January in a row. Embarrassed, she told the group how, two years ago, she lost twenty pounds in the first part of the year but gained most of it back in the second half.
She said she joined again last year, but, with frustration dripping on every word, she confessed, “When the new program started last year, and they said I could eat anything I wanted, I was more hopeful.” But it wasn’t that easy and she admitted, “I had a hard time getting used to the new way and I wasn’t losing as fast as before. So I dropped out after a couple months. Now I’m six pounds more than this time last year.”
The group understood, especially the nine women and men who, like Janice, were back. Each one hoping that (maybe this time) they would finally accomplish their New Year’s goal to lose weight. Will they do it this time? The odds aren’t in their favor.
Losing weight and getting fit annually tops the list of “most common” New Year’s Resolutions, along with paying off debt and saving money. Yet only about 8% of the people who SAY it actually DO it. That means that for every 100 people who make those promises, 92 of them fail. Will you be one of them? What is it about losing weight – or any other resolution – that makes success so elusive?
There’s a little-understood but simple secret to success that almost everyone ignores. The secret is in learning how to conquer your comfort zone.
Here’s the thing: Your comfort zone is that “inside” place you’re familiar with, where you know what you’re dealing with and know how to handle it. When you leave your comfort zone, even for something better, it’s uncomfortable. You can’t ‘have the luxury of auto-pilot in the new place. As s result, you have to think about what you’re doing. It’s an effort…work.
When you make new choices, not only does it take time to think about them, but maybe those choices don’t push that emotional satisfaction button in your head right away. So you feel a variety of emotions: scared, unsatisfied, agitated, etc. Here are some examples:
Dieting: Instead of just grabbing something you like from the fridge, or off a fast food menu, you have to stop and think about what what you can have and make different choices.
Money: You can’t just pull out your credit card to pay for that dress or dinner or show tickets. You have to think about your budget and maybe say “no” to that thing you want or want to do.
Growing your business: If doing the same old same old is getting you business but not growth. You have to step out of your comfort zone to step up.
Here’s the kicker: Until you develop a comfort level with your new behaviors, a part of you yearns to go back to that familiar space. For a while the effort seems like more pain than gain. And that’s why you quit.
Dealing with your comfort zone is probably your biggest obstacle you’ll face when you have a new goal. It’s also the one that most people ignore – which is why only 8 out of every 100 people stick to their resolutions.
The good news is that it’s one of the things that’s totally in your control.
The Victory Stretch
Facing obstacles is how you get the opportunity to victory. Victory is the stretch you make out of your comfort zone into that greater, more fabulous expression of who you really are. That’s what you want – to be all of your best self. Right? So do it. Start by conquering your comfort zone using these three tips: 1. Recognize the Resistance. You’re going to experience some negative feelings as you move out of your comfort zone. In the past, how did you act just before you quit? Were there things you said, like, “This isn’t working.” or “Why bother?” and “I can’t do this.”
Do you have a pattern? You probably do. What is it?
Your pattern of resistance could show up as sadness, stress, tiredness, anger, disgust, passive-aggressiveness, or something else. It can be a combination of things. Write them down so you heighten your awareness.
2 . Prepare for the Challenge. When you start working on your new goal, and your resistance pattern starts showing up, what will you do? Knowing in advance what your triggers are and how you will handle your discomfort will create a new comfort zone for you. That will boost your chances of pushing forward and being victorious. Here are a few ways to spit in the face of resistance:
Set up a “yes set”. Seeing results is motivating, BUT it takes a while to see them. In between, you need to give yourself some motivations, like:
YES! I exercised three times this week. That’s better than last week
YES! I set up auto-deposit from my paycheck to savings and I didn’t even notice the difference
YES! I networked with six new people this month – double what I did all last quarter.
Remember your “why”. Make a list of all the positive outcomes that will result from achieving your goal. Read them each morning, and whenever your resistance shows up.
Acknowledge yours feelings. Talk to them like the friends they are. “I know you’re here to help me stay in my comfort zone. I appreciate that you want to make me feel safe and secure. But I really want to [whatever the new thing is]. I’d rather that you help me get comfortable with that and, if you can’t, go away.” Sounds a little airy-fairy, but give it a try.
3. Get Support. Find a class, mastermind group, coach, or accountability partner. It will help you in your quest. Having one makes a huge difference. When you make a commitment to someone else, and know that are rooting for you, they create a type of comfort zone. As a result, you are more likely to deal with your resistance effectively. OFFER: If you are looking for help and support in achieving a new goal, you’ll want to be a part of the EMPOWERING and BEST #midlifemakeover. Join me for theSavvy Sizzle Workshop, starting in the new year, just in time for your comfort zone melt down.
Learn more at Annmarie Kelly’s Savvy Sizzle Master Class
# Victorious Woman Project, #Victorious Woman, #WomensEmpowerment, #VictoryChicks, #AnnmarieKelly, #FiveYearMarriage, #MidlifeMakeover